Sardar SMS

Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
"Me sick, no work"
Boss SMS back:
"When I am sick I kiss my wife try it"
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
"Me ok, ur wife very sweet"

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Sardar saw a very high Airtel Tower
& red light glowing on the top,
seeing this he said €India is developing fast,
see there are traffic signals for Aeroplane in the air

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In a party a lady wanted
to go to toilet so
she inquired with a sardar
papaji susu karne ki jagah dikhao,

sardarji replied u naughty
pehle tum dikhao.
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Interviewer:what is skeleton?
Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
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Sardar on phone:
Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right now.
Doctor: Is this her first child?
Sardar: No this is her husband speaking‚¦
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1st ever intelligent sardar.
Teacher: what do u call a person
who cannot hear anything?
sardar: u can call him anything,
because he cannot hear anything:-)
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A sardarji goes to a chinese restaurant
and puts his finger
on the last of menu: Bring this.
Waiter: Oh! you can't get it
because he is the owner of restaurant.
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Sardar english k paper main fail ho gaya,
He did translation:

1.Main aam admi nahi hon
I'm not a mango man

2.Sarda or garma fruit hain.
Colda & hota r fruits

3.Mujhey bhi english ati hay
English comes 2 me also

4.do ro do chaar.
give and give four.

5.Mera taluk hari pur hazara se hay
I belong 2 green pur thousanda:
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A sardar had a child after 3 month of marriage.
He asked his wife ye 3 month k bad bacha kaise howa?

Wife replied:tumhari shadi ko kitna arsa hua?
sardar:3 months.

Wife: or meri shadi ko ?
Sardar: 3 months

Wife: or bacha kitne month k baad?
Sardar:3 month.

Wife: total kitne hue?
Sardar: oye 9 months & start dancing
Balle Balle;->
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A Sardar & his wife were waiting for train
itne main KHYBER MAIL aa gaye
Sardar bhag k train mein charha
or
apni wife se bola
jab khyber female aye to tum bhi ajana
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Sardar darvaze pe GUN liye khara tha
Wife: y r u standing here?
Sardar: Sher k shikar pe ja raha hon
Wife: To jao na..!
Sardar: Kase jaon baher KUTTA khara hai
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Sardar selected a short girl to marry.

Why?

Because guru ji told him

Musibat jitni choti ho utna acha hai ...
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Four guys
1 from Harward:
1 Oxford
1 Texas
&
a Sardar from Pujab university
1 common question:
What is the fastest thing in world?
Oxford:Light
Harvard:Thought
Texas:Blink of an eye
Sardar:Its loose motions,
because last night I was lying in my bed
& before I could blink,think or turn on the lights,
it was over!
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Tring Tring Tring.
Sardar: Hello kon bol raha hai?
Other side: Ji, main bol raha hon.
Sardar: oye ye to kamal ho gia,
idhar se bhi main hi bol raha hon.
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Teacher to Sardar: What is Number “Seven‚ , Even or Odd
Sardar: Even

Teacher: How can you make seven even?
Sardar:Remove the S!!
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Sardar made a call to the airport.
Asked,"How long is the journey from Punjab to America?"

Receiptionist: "One second sir....".
Sardar: Ok, thank you..!!!
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Sardar said to doctor:Pore jism main
kahin bhi ungli lagao to bohat dard hota hai,
Doctor suggested full body Xray
when he checked, Xray found fracture in "Ungli"
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Taxi driver to sardar:-

Sardar ji petrol khatam ho gaya ha gaddi agay nahi ja rahi

sardar: Koi gal nahi gaddi piche lelo
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Sardars Friend: Yaar,

Last Year The Name Plate Outside Your House
Read Santa Singh, B.A.
This Year It Reads Santa Singh, M.A.
When Did You Finish Your Masters Degree?
Sardar: You Dont Understand.
Last Year My Wife Died,
I Put B.A. To Indicate “Bachelor Again‚.
Then I Took A Second Wife, So M.A. Is “Married Again‚.
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In a practical Exam
Examiner showed legs of bird n said:
Tell the bird's name
Sardar:I dont know
Exminer: U r failed.Wats ur name?
Sardar: You see my legs, and tell me.
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A sardar ji pulled out 6 people from a burning house...
still he was in jail.......why?
coz all the 6 were fire brigade staff !
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A Sardar & his wife filed an application for divorce.

Judge asked :
How will you divide, you have 3 children?

Sardar replied :
Ok! We will apply next year.
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A sardar went to Pizza Hut.
There he ordered a Pizza.
The Waiter asked him:
Sir shell I cut it into 4 pieces or 8 pieces.
Sardar replied:
O 4 hi le aa yaar,
8 to nahin khaye jayein gay
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Teacher: what is the scientific formula for water?
Sardar: h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.
Teacher: nonsense! how did you derive that?
Sardar: auntie, it is H to O (h2o)!
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Sardar got job in a telenor call centre.
Customer: telelenor sim blocked what to do?
Sardar: dont take tension remove telenor &
put warid sim.
Thank you for calling ufone.
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A Sardar looking at sky asks another Sardar :
Is that a sun or moon?
Other Sardar replies :
Oye ! No idea‚¦Im new to this city..
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Do U know why a sardar ji kept
the door open while taking a bath?

Because he was scared that someone
might see through the “KEY HOLE‚.
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Interviewer asked sardarji:
Which are the 2 latest versions of java?
Sardarji: Marjava & Mitjava
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A sardarji went to a
STD/ISD/PCO SHOP and
slapped the operator twice.
:-( Guess why ?
bcoz there it was written
"Number dial karnay se pehley do lagain"
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Sardar : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying....
When a person asked what he was doing....
He replied... Oye!! Higher Studies Yaar...!!!
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A Teacher lecturing on population -
In India after Every 10 sec a
woman gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up-
we must find & stop her!.
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Sardar-
why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup,
why r others running?
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Sardar at an Art Gallery:
I suppose this horrible looking thing is
what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
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Sardar's wish : when i die,
I wanna die like my grandpa
who died peacefully in his sleep
not screaming
like all the passengers in the
car he was driving..
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NURSE kept SARDAR'S FINGER in HER MOUTH
after BLOOD TEST.
THEN SARDAR STARTED DANCING .
NURSE:y r u DANCING.
SARDAR:next is URINE TEST
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Teacher: "I killed a person"
convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".
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Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife.
Two seconds later a report came
to his phone and he started dancing.
The report said, "DELIVERED".
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2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Don't worry, I have a one more.
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On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him,
"Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring?"
Sardar : "Ya sure, from landline or mobile".
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Doctor to sardar : You will die within 2 hours.
Do you want to see any one before you die?
Sardar : Yes. A good doctor.
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Sardar was busy removing
a wheel from his auto.
A man asks sardar why are

you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board.
Parking is only for 2 wheeler
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Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
Boss was happy and asked "what you did till evening?"
Sardar :"Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright"
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Interviewee;What is your date of birth?
Sardar;nov 28.
Interviewer;which year?
Sardar;abey ullu everyyear.
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A Sardar saw a Beautiful Girl,he Went and Kissed her.
Girl: "STUPID what r u doing?"
Sardar: B.Com final year"